[15 Mar 2006|06:03pm] The irritation we're pretending not to show Has replaced the motivation That I had not long ago I know that It's the beginning of the end And I don't know where we lost control It's the beginning of the end And I know that I am all alone Interrogation has replaced the trust we had Your misguided accusations Helping me to turn my back I know that I thought that we would find our way I thought our life would be ok I thought that you believed in me But now it seems so far away The life we knew before is gone There is no compromising The life you save will be your own To find your inner senses ( IbeginTOhateYOUforYOURfaceNOTjustTHEthingsYOUdo. ) post comment

[15 Mar 2006|05:58pm] The irritation we're pretending not to show Has replaced the motivation That I had not long ago I know that It's the beginning of the end And I don't know where we lost control It's the beginning of the end And I know that I am all alone Interrogation has replaced the trust we had Your misguided accusations Helping me to turn my back I know that I thought that we would find our way I thought our life would be ok I thought that you believed in me But now it seems so far away ( The ) There is no compromising The life you save will be your own To find your inner senses post comment

[13 Feb 2006|11:30am] im so sick of spending my time at home. and i have no where else to go because i dont have any friends. life used to be so good. what happened. life is still good. but im still alone in every sense of the fact. i look into things wayyyyy too much and then when things dont go how i expect i get all sad and gay. and tomorrows valentines day prolly the gayest day of the year. its shouldnt even be a holiday the tradition should be all couples should be burned alive at the stake. AHHH i dont know i just want someone to tell me what i want. i want it to already be there before i get there waiting and i want it now. i need someone to tell me what i need. 1 comment|post comment

[22 Jan 2006|09:36pm] i dont even know what to say. i am so pissed off. i am seriously shaking. i have never once in my life been this mad. 1 comment|post comment

[16 Jan 2006|10:19am] so its the end of vacation and i go back to school wednesday. and i really dont want to. im going to be more serious about this though. im not gunna not care either. im starting to breakdown in this house. i cant stay here. everybody hates me and i pretty much dont give a shit but they always like... attack me. i dont know why i cant stop yelling at them and why they wont leave me alone. and i try really hard not to cry when im that pissed off because it means they won but sometimes i just get so mad. my mom said she wants to sell the car now because i said it was a sucky car when actually, it is. it shuts off when im driving randomly and last night at fucking 4 in the morning the car door wouldnt shut. so my mom told me to go pick up some bus passes. and now andis yelling at me because apparently all i fucking do is complain about the car. and its my fault that my mom wants to sell it. i just want this whole phase thing of stupid bitches being stupid to end. post comment

i only want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with me [02 Jan 2006|08:31pm] new years was good and its been good ever since. yeah. i got an ill compliment today.... i was told that my body is ten times better than ms. paris hilton herself. i beg to differ but whatever. i dyed my hair bleach blonde with this black in the front. its ill. i bet my thug 2 remix today at work. thank god. i was starting to get mad. tomorrow i work with dink and then wednesday with margarit. :) yayayayayyaya 1 comment|post comment

[15 Dec 2005|05:54pm] will just called from alabama i miss him he comes home tomorrow. i havent seen him since high school. sooo i got a psp and its prolly the best thing thats every happened to me besides hemrroids post comment

[14 Dec 2005|01:53pm] i surprising did well on my math final and i passed. one more class to go. i think im in need of a celebration. ugggh does anyone believe in the ouija board? im definately eating fast food like every day of my life and i think it should stop... but its sooo good... its like a drug... but it doesnt beat candy. i love candy. someone should buy me some candy. good kinda like the penny candy mmmmm post comment

[13 Dec 2005|11:39am] i definately want to go out to breakfast right now. uhm yesterday at work was the worst, i was with bimi and he just creeped me out a little too much for my liking. i know i cant find another job but i have to tell dale ill quit if i dont get more hours because this is just getting out of hand. psychology is over for the rest of the semister thank god. i just hope i passed. 5 comments|post comment

[10 Dec 2005|05:04pm] some people should just break up with their girlfriend immediately. and go out with me instead :c) because im better than her, duh. no but seriously, this whole crush thing is cute but something else needs to happen. sometimes i just want to grab his face and kiss him and see what happens. 2 comments|post comment

[05 Dec 2005|09:11pm] nothings changed. im bored and my back hurts. a lot actually. work sucked again as usual. tomorow i have no school and no work. this hasnt happened in a month. i am so excited. randomly i had a dream about ryan last night it was mad weird. sometimes i just want to call him. but i cant. and i wont. i guess maybe i just want to know if he ever thinks of me. i dont care, i miss him. the silverstein show was alright. it was disgustingly packed in there. ew. christmas is almost here. taste of chaos this year seems to be like a good show. im planning on going because i didnt go last year...and i COULDNT go to sounds of the underground and then that bullshit happened with hellfest. i like a boy who likes me but has a girlfriend. i like a girl who likes me but has a girlfriend. anyways once again, life is moving way too fast. 2 comments|post comment

[07 Nov 2005|04:07pm] so it trurns out that my week isnt going to be as good as i thought it would be. my auntie ann died last night. she just turned 90. she had a stroke and that was that. it reminded me of russ. i miss him so much. it breaks my heart to know that ill never see him again. ever. so all auntie anns stuff is spreaded through the week and the worst part is sunday is russ' birthday so were going out to eat and going to visit his grave. tonights the as i lay dying, unearth and sliknot concert. hopefully ill have a good time. 4 comments|post comment

[03 Nov 2005|12:04am] she made me promise not to forget about our plans today. and i didnt forget. my schedule was clear for just me and her. ive only been wating 6 and a half hours.... she could still come right? 2 comments|post comment

[30 Oct 2005|01:10pm] i feel... lonely more than ever. and i dont know why. its really a not nice feeling. is it bad that i sitll think about him? i dont know i try to think about other people and i do but its the worst to know that all itll ever be is what i think in my head. i really like this kid but itll never work and i know that. but i dont know if im okay with that. i dont knoooooooooooow. i dont know what to think or what to feel anymore. look at my face shaded in gray wasting away I'm almost gone 9 comments|post comment

[27 Oct 2005|06:37pm] ( It's such a shame how I'll miss you ) 5 comments|post comment

[23 Oct 2005|01:40pm] This weekend sucked. Friday - got a really bad grade on a paper i thought i did good on and was suggested to withdraw. - got lost in providence trying to find abbington. jasmine drove and wasted all my gas and we ended up going home. + smoked 3 blunts. Saturday - couldnt go to the orchards because of i had to work. changed to sunday. - worked 9am-5:30pm - me and lauren were susposed to go to the strip joint. we didnt go because she wanted to drink witb bob and ralph instead. Sunday + woke up to erika talking on the phone in the hallway. - were not going to the orchards. + smoked a blunt at 11:30 - going to work 3-11 1 comment|post comment

[15 Oct 2005|12:29pm] Me summer and lauren went to fridays last night. told em it was my birthday and i had to stand up in the restaurant and got sang to and such. and i got free ice cream. and it was the bomb. we made prank phone calls to faggots and my sister who got extreamly upset and it was hilarious. FUCK YOU. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE YOU AT A RAVE WAVING YOUR GAY GLOWSTICKS? went to the store at 4 am in the flood to get candy. i havent stayed up till 5 am in forever. i havent just chilled and did nothing in so long. it felt good. the old days are too ill for words. THANKS GUYS. 3 comments|post comment

[12 Oct 2005|01:27am] i got my lip pierced again... and now its complete... i should have pictures up asap. i suspose i should get sleep. back to school tomorrow :( i heart talking about boys <33333 it makes me happy and giddy. 1 comment|post comment

[05 Oct 2005|07:52pm] people are unbelieveable and i hate them all. p.s i want tony hawks american wasteland , thx. 10 comments|post comment

[03 Oct 2005|12:48pm] im sick. i have to go to the doctors for 130. i didnt go to school today. and i didnt go friday because i didnt want to. i need to get my shit together asap and stop fucking around. jeeeeeeeeeeeeze. i feel like im dying or something of that sort. tonight = ultimate fight night k, thx. that makes me happy in my pants. i went out to eat with dink before she had class. that was awesome. we looked like jackasses at Fridays, so we left. i couldnt stop laughing. my other tattoo is finally healing and i like it. a lot. it looks good with the other one and with my piercing. i got a new hurrr cut. i like it. hott people are talking to me now and hehehe. i still dont have a significant other however. whatever. off the the doctors. 1 comment|post comment

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